Real love is selfless. Jesus says in Matthew 5 that we are to love not only our friends, but our enemies, too. If we love only those who love us, how are we any different from nonbelievers? I'm really learning about God's call to love Him and others in the way that He loves us--full of grace and mercy, without expecting anything in return. I'm getting some pragmatic experience with this through nannying and hanging out with the kids in my neighborhood. Though neither are what I would at all consider my "enemies" (Matt. 5:44), I've come to realize they can be enemies to my flesh because they call me to love as Christ--beyond human capacity into a way that only He can love through me.
A great example, as I mentioned, is in sitting for my baby niece and another less-than-one-year-old. Most babies younger than 10 months can't talk. Most can't smile or hug on demand. They need to be cared for and loved, but do not yet have the capacity to return a lot of that love. Yes, babies are cute and sweet and adorable, but sometimes I wonder why they cry and fuss just after being held or fed or played with. Can't they instead say, 'Thanks, Aunt Neen-Neen (that's me), for all the great things you do for me. You're the best and I love you!" Could it be that my flesh is screaming, "Jenny, you deserve better! You deserve to care for children who can communicate that they love and appreciate you for all you do for them"? How ludicrous and disturbing! But yes, I'm human and have those thoughts. However, my spirit desires to love them so much that I don't expect them to not cry as I clean up a poopy diaper, or anticipate that they'll flash a smile after I give them a bottle. (Side note: The babies are wonderful and the mommies and daddies are always so grateful. My struggles are no reflection on them or their children.)
Example #2: I've hung out with some kids in my neighborhood on several occasions. I may be off-base, but I believe a few have the idea that they deserve a meal or a gift or a ride somewhere because they are "poor black kids" and I'm a"rich white girl." Although they need to learn better how to say thank you just to be successful in life, I should not expect it to be said. I have to ask myself, "Is the reason I'm doing this to be appreciated and to feel good about myself?" Sounds pretty unbiblical if that's the case. Sure, you feel good when you help others. But again, Jesus calls us to love beyond reason and beyond ourselves. It doesn't make sense to the world to keep pouring your time and money into children that don't seem to appreciate it. But Jesus said to do it so that others may see the selfless love He has for them. I have many of my adult friends in Glenwood to thank for this realization--for your dying to yourselves by living sacrificially and loving our young friends selflessly.
The golden rule is not "Do unto others as they do to you" or "Do unto others so that you get the thanks you think you deserve." It's "Do unto others as you would have them to do you." And even if they don't do unto you as you would have them, love them anyway.
Thank you, God, for your selfless love. Thanks for showing me how to love others selflessly.
