Sunday, March 23, 2008
Friday, March 21, 2008
It's Friday, But Sunday's Comin'
I stole this from another blog I read. Friday may seem hopeless, but halellujah for the hope of Sunday!
Sunday's Comin'
(Just click on the link...I don't know how to get the actual video on my page!)
Sunday's Comin'
(Just click on the link...I don't know how to get the actual video on my page!)
A Marathon, Not a Sprint
I've heard this metaphor about life several times, but God has been reminding me a lot of this recently.
I would love to run a marathon, a half-marathon, heck--even a 5K, but I'm not the greatest with endurance. I'd much rather run and walk in alternating intervals than stick it out for 30 straight minutes of jogging. I've noticed this exact parallel in my walk with Jesus. It's so much easier to have short-lived excitement after a great church service or Bible study than it is to seek out the joy of the Lord on normal day-to-day basis. It's easier to have amazing quiet times on a weekend retreat than it is to seek out quietness for the Lord in the busyness of a workweek. Easier, but not better.
In the same way, as I'm trying to be disciplined about diet and regular exercise, I get frustrated when I don't see the immediate results I want. Oftentimes my "feeling good" about myself is short-lived. I think I'm that way in my relationship with Jesus: I really am following him for a little while, and then I seem to throw discipline out the window and stray away from intimacy with him. Perhaps this is because I don't "feel" his presence or don't see the answered prayers I want to see. And because I forget there's a battle to fight and a marathon to run.
So what to do? I think there's an Almighty Two-Step Plan for Endurance that God's been laying on my heart. First, I don't need to rely on my feelings so much. I never want to completely disregard my emotions, but so often I depend on them instead of God's truth. I know this involves the discipline of memorizing Scripture. Secondly, I want to regularly remember who God is and my identity in him. Being reminded of his freedom, I desire to be disciplined in my relationship with Christ in the way that I try to be diligent about being physically healthy. If I can convince myself that working out and eating healthy will help me be more physically fit, even if it takes a while to see and feel a difference, then surely my spirit can be at peace knowing that daily walking with the Holy Spirit will not be fruitless. My eyes can be fixed not on what is seen, but what is unseen and eternal, which is a relationship with God and the hope of spending forever with him.
Lord, thanks for wanting me to finish the race well. I cannot run it on my own strength. I desperately need your discipline all along the way to remind me who you are and who I am in you. Thank you that I'm not alone in this marathon, and that you're always a step ahead.
I would love to run a marathon, a half-marathon, heck--even a 5K, but I'm not the greatest with endurance. I'd much rather run and walk in alternating intervals than stick it out for 30 straight minutes of jogging. I've noticed this exact parallel in my walk with Jesus. It's so much easier to have short-lived excitement after a great church service or Bible study than it is to seek out the joy of the Lord on normal day-to-day basis. It's easier to have amazing quiet times on a weekend retreat than it is to seek out quietness for the Lord in the busyness of a workweek. Easier, but not better.
In the same way, as I'm trying to be disciplined about diet and regular exercise, I get frustrated when I don't see the immediate results I want. Oftentimes my "feeling good" about myself is short-lived. I think I'm that way in my relationship with Jesus: I really am following him for a little while, and then I seem to throw discipline out the window and stray away from intimacy with him. Perhaps this is because I don't "feel" his presence or don't see the answered prayers I want to see. And because I forget there's a battle to fight and a marathon to run.
So what to do? I think there's an Almighty Two-Step Plan for Endurance that God's been laying on my heart. First, I don't need to rely on my feelings so much. I never want to completely disregard my emotions, but so often I depend on them instead of God's truth. I know this involves the discipline of memorizing Scripture. Secondly, I want to regularly remember who God is and my identity in him. Being reminded of his freedom, I desire to be disciplined in my relationship with Christ in the way that I try to be diligent about being physically healthy. If I can convince myself that working out and eating healthy will help me be more physically fit, even if it takes a while to see and feel a difference, then surely my spirit can be at peace knowing that daily walking with the Holy Spirit will not be fruitless. My eyes can be fixed not on what is seen, but what is unseen and eternal, which is a relationship with God and the hope of spending forever with him.
Lord, thanks for wanting me to finish the race well. I cannot run it on my own strength. I desperately need your discipline all along the way to remind me who you are and who I am in you. Thank you that I'm not alone in this marathon, and that you're always a step ahead.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
7 Strange Things About Me
I think I've been tagged for this shindig a couple times, so I guess folks want to know some quirky things about me. I'm pretty sure I can think of 27 weird things. But here are just a few:
1. 99% of the time I get a shopping cart--Target, grocery store, doesn't matter--it's malfunctional. It squeaks or won't turn correctly or is incredibly loud compared to other shoppers' normal carts. This is why, even if I have many items to buy, I prefer to lug around a basket over pushing a dysfunctional shopping cart.
2. When I was in sixth grade, my mom ran over my foot. There's really no elaborate story. She just didn't put the car in park as I was getting out of the backseat, and rolled right on top of it so my leg was literally caught under the tire. Funniest part is I screamed for a few seconds before she realized what happened and knocked the car in reverse. It was pretty miraculous that there weren't any broken bones.
3. I was famous when I was younger...around Pitt County...and only for a few days during the summer when an annual Crimestoppers telethon was held. My Girl Scout troop used to do a dance video every year and people would call in, pledge an amount, and request to see our video. From "Every Heartbeat" to "Country Boys and Girls" to "Mmmbop," these videos would make really good blackmail.
4. Also when I was younger I loved to dress up. And I really liked studying about the solar system. Put 'em together and whatdya got? A solar system costume for Halloween, of course! My sister and brother-in-law pick on my big time for this one. :) If I can get a picture of this posted, I'll share the humor.
5. I named my car Nina. Nina the Neon.
6. I have a scar on the back of my ear from where my dog bit me. Never hit a dog on the nose when you're 5 years old and eye level with him.
7. A secret (well, not anymore) desire of mine is to take breakdancing lessons, become a hardcore b-girl, and join a dance crew. Look for me in "Step Up 3."
Jeremy, Allen, and Kelly--tag, you're it.
1. 99% of the time I get a shopping cart--Target, grocery store, doesn't matter--it's malfunctional. It squeaks or won't turn correctly or is incredibly loud compared to other shoppers' normal carts. This is why, even if I have many items to buy, I prefer to lug around a basket over pushing a dysfunctional shopping cart.
2. When I was in sixth grade, my mom ran over my foot. There's really no elaborate story. She just didn't put the car in park as I was getting out of the backseat, and rolled right on top of it so my leg was literally caught under the tire. Funniest part is I screamed for a few seconds before she realized what happened and knocked the car in reverse. It was pretty miraculous that there weren't any broken bones.
3. I was famous when I was younger...around Pitt County...and only for a few days during the summer when an annual Crimestoppers telethon was held. My Girl Scout troop used to do a dance video every year and people would call in, pledge an amount, and request to see our video. From "Every Heartbeat" to "Country Boys and Girls" to "Mmmbop," these videos would make really good blackmail.
4. Also when I was younger I loved to dress up. And I really liked studying about the solar system. Put 'em together and whatdya got? A solar system costume for Halloween, of course! My sister and brother-in-law pick on my big time for this one. :) If I can get a picture of this posted, I'll share the humor.
5. I named my car Nina. Nina the Neon.
6. I have a scar on the back of my ear from where my dog bit me. Never hit a dog on the nose when you're 5 years old and eye level with him.
7. A secret (well, not anymore) desire of mine is to take breakdancing lessons, become a hardcore b-girl, and join a dance crew. Look for me in "Step Up 3."
Jeremy, Allen, and Kelly--tag, you're it.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Bon Voyage, America!
Or should I say, "Adios, Estados Unidos"? In about four and a half months, I'll be getting on a plane headed to La Paz, Bolivia in South America. There I'll be teaching first grade at an international school. I'm super excited about this incredible opportunity, but also a little overwhelmed that it's coming so quickly!
Besides being able to serve Christ as a missionary in the poorest country in South America; learning about the culture including the Spanish language, and possibly some other native dialects; and getting to teach a class full of sweet six-year-olds, there are a few other (slightly selfish) reasons why I'm really looking forward to moving to Bolivia:
1. It's a beautiful city! Complete with mountains and valleys to which pictures I'm sure do not do justice, La Paz has a historic but developed inner city as well as plenty of scenic routes for hiking. (La Paz is the highest capital city in the world at almost 12,000 feet!)
2. I might have the opportunity to explore some other countries during Christmas and summer breaks. Bolivia is bordered by Argentina, Chile, Peru, Paraguay, and Brazil. The possibilities for adventure are endless...well, as far as my wallet will take me.
3. La Paz has really good coffee. I may not be getting my Starbucks fill (there are none in Bolivia to my knowledge) but from what I've read, the coffee of Bolivia is quite tasty and much easier on the budget than my lattes and frappuccinos. The fruit and chocolate are also supposed to be exquisite...I can't wait to try 'em! Hopefully some of the families will show me how to prepare meals Bolivian-style.
4. The dance and music look so fun; I really want to learn (without having to wear those dresses, of course)!
5. I sponsor a kid through Compassion International who lives in Cochabamba, just a few hours away from La Paz. What a cool experience it would be to meet him and his family!
Please pray for me as God prepares my heart for this crazy 2-year adventure that only He could've arranged! Thank you for your prayers, and if you're interested in supporting me financially, I'd love to talk with you about that. :)
Thank you, Lord, for this exciting opportunity to serve where you have called me! I'm so grateful!
Besides being able to serve Christ as a missionary in the poorest country in South America; learning about the culture including the Spanish language, and possibly some other native dialects; and getting to teach a class full of sweet six-year-olds, there are a few other (slightly selfish) reasons why I'm really looking forward to moving to Bolivia:
1. It's a beautiful city! Complete with mountains and valleys to which pictures I'm sure do not do justice, La Paz has a historic but developed inner city as well as plenty of scenic routes for hiking. (La Paz is the highest capital city in the world at almost 12,000 feet!)
2. I might have the opportunity to explore some other countries during Christmas and summer breaks. Bolivia is bordered by Argentina, Chile, Peru, Paraguay, and Brazil. The possibilities for adventure are endless...well, as far as my wallet will take me.
3. La Paz has really good coffee. I may not be getting my Starbucks fill (there are none in Bolivia to my knowledge) but from what I've read, the coffee of Bolivia is quite tasty and much easier on the budget than my lattes and frappuccinos. The fruit and chocolate are also supposed to be exquisite...I can't wait to try 'em! Hopefully some of the families will show me how to prepare meals Bolivian-style.
4. The dance and music look so fun; I really want to learn (without having to wear those dresses, of course)!
5. I sponsor a kid through Compassion International who lives in Cochabamba, just a few hours away from La Paz. What a cool experience it would be to meet him and his family!
Please pray for me as God prepares my heart for this crazy 2-year adventure that only He could've arranged! Thank you for your prayers, and if you're interested in supporting me financially, I'd love to talk with you about that. :)
Thank you, Lord, for this exciting opportunity to serve where you have called me! I'm so grateful!
Saturday, February 23, 2008
hypothesis of inebriation
First of all, I apologize because this post is lengthy. Second, let me provide some background to this title. I've always been interested in knowing the answers to "why" questions, especially when it comes to people's behavior. So recently I've been out to a few bars with some coworkers. (Call me heathen or pagan if you will, but I have found it a great way to get to know these folks and share the love of Christ with them. But that's another topic for another blog...on to my psychological analysis.) At these bars I've observed all kinds of people, but what I find most interesting is that for a vast majority of barhoppers, the goal is to get drunk. And you might be thinking, well duh!?! In my naivity, I'd hoped for a few out there like myself who go for the social aspect of it, not to get completely intoxicated. For this majority population, I have come to a conclusion about their motivation for getting drunk. I believe it is to escape. And not just to escape from stress at work or problems in a relationship, but to be totally free from caring at all, for better or worse. When you're drunk, you don't care as much what you say or how you act because you care less of what others think. It's easier to be free with how you really feel about people or things, free to sing and dance around like crazy, free to have quality conversations with strangers who become fast friends. It's also an escape from the worries, problems, and issues of life. It's easier to forget and just not care about those things for a little while.
But then reality hits. You have a hangover the next day, completely regret the hurtful things you said to your best friend, and vaguely recall fooling around with someone who remains nameless. The pain is back. You are no longer carefree. You have the heavy burden of all of those cares and then some hanging over you...until the next night out that you can go get drunk and escape...
So the vicious cycle continues. The thing about this method of coping and escaping the cares of the world is that it's temporary; the pain always come back, sometimes worse than it was before.
Thank God there is hope. There is something, actually someone, who can offer us the freedom that we all crave. We don't want to worry about all of our issues and problems. And we don't have to. Jesus Christ offers us freedom from these burdens. He doesn't take all difficult circumstances or trying relationships away, but he intervenes and helps in the tough situations while also providing peace. We experience this peace when we remember that he is in control when we hand our lives --all of ourselves and life situations--over to him. (1 Peter 5:7, John 16:33, Phil. 4:7) This just means admitting that we can't do it on our own. We need a Savior. When we acknowledge our need for Christ, and ask him to lead our lives, we see how much he really does care for us and love us. We begin to see him working out our bad situations for good. We experience the freedom that comes in knowing Christ.
This freedom is not unlike the liberty that people want to experience via alcohol. In having a relationship with God, we find our identity as his children; therefore, we're more likely to speak and act without caring as much what others think. We're free to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and open up to others with whom we wouldn't normally speak. We're free to be joyful, to sing and dance around like crazy because we have life! The best part of it is, this freedom-life is an ongoing offer. Jesus offers abundant life, and will give it freely to anyone who asks and stops trying to find it on their own (2 Peter 3:9). Jesus promised us, "I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of" (John 10:10, The Message). That life is not just after death, but now!
I write all of these things only because I sell out so many times for things that are not life-giving. The only thing that can give this full life, this freedom from worry, is a life in Christ.
Lord, thank you for making your children free and alive, characteristics we can't find anywhere but in you.
But then reality hits. You have a hangover the next day, completely regret the hurtful things you said to your best friend, and vaguely recall fooling around with someone who remains nameless. The pain is back. You are no longer carefree. You have the heavy burden of all of those cares and then some hanging over you...until the next night out that you can go get drunk and escape...
So the vicious cycle continues. The thing about this method of coping and escaping the cares of the world is that it's temporary; the pain always come back, sometimes worse than it was before.
Thank God there is hope. There is something, actually someone, who can offer us the freedom that we all crave. We don't want to worry about all of our issues and problems. And we don't have to. Jesus Christ offers us freedom from these burdens. He doesn't take all difficult circumstances or trying relationships away, but he intervenes and helps in the tough situations while also providing peace. We experience this peace when we remember that he is in control when we hand our lives --all of ourselves and life situations--over to him. (1 Peter 5:7, John 16:33, Phil. 4:7) This just means admitting that we can't do it on our own. We need a Savior. When we acknowledge our need for Christ, and ask him to lead our lives, we see how much he really does care for us and love us. We begin to see him working out our bad situations for good. We experience the freedom that comes in knowing Christ.
This freedom is not unlike the liberty that people want to experience via alcohol. In having a relationship with God, we find our identity as his children; therefore, we're more likely to speak and act without caring as much what others think. We're free to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and open up to others with whom we wouldn't normally speak. We're free to be joyful, to sing and dance around like crazy because we have life! The best part of it is, this freedom-life is an ongoing offer. Jesus offers abundant life, and will give it freely to anyone who asks and stops trying to find it on their own (2 Peter 3:9). Jesus promised us, "I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of" (John 10:10, The Message). That life is not just after death, but now!
I write all of these things only because I sell out so many times for things that are not life-giving. The only thing that can give this full life, this freedom from worry, is a life in Christ.
Lord, thank you for making your children free and alive, characteristics we can't find anywhere but in you.
Monday, February 18, 2008
LOST
Nope, I'm not referring to the tv show, but to a feeling I experience all too frequently. Anyone who knows me well knows that I'm directionally challenged. Combine that with a poor short-term memory and this girl has a hard time finding her way around. I'm not sure what makes some places harder for me to get to than others, but I do know that often times in making my way to a new destination or an old destination from a different starting point, I get lost.
Tonight was one such night when my DI (Direction Impairment) kicked in full force. I was going to a place only a block over from a house that I go to weekly. It should've taken me no more than fifteen minutes to get there. How long did it actually take me? Oh, only thirty-five. I drove around and around, reading the same dang street signs time and again, turning the opposite direction only to wind up in virtually the same place! Not only was I driving for what seemed like hours, but my gas gauge also was sinking dangerously closer to the "E." After about a half hour, I realized there were two things I had done wrong: 1. I had not called anyone at my intended destination to get help for fear of looking incompetent and silly. 2. I had literally thought about asking God for some help, but reconsidered and decided I could find it just fine on my own.
It wasn't until after yelling some improper vocabulary and banging the steering wheel (don't worry...these are just symptoms of DI) that I thought it would be a good time to ask for help. Still too embarrassed to call anyone, I prayed. Unfortunately, no light or star from heaven appeared to show me the way. In fact, I still made a couple wrong turns, continuing to pray that God would help me out, and beginning to feel more at peace. And he answered! The street I was looking for was right under my nose. Hallelujah!
This circumstance may seem slightly melodramatic, but I think it needed to be for me to re-learn a valuable lesson: I can't drive life on my own. Boy, I sure do try. But doing life on my own strength is like having the gas gauge sitting on "E," driving around in circles, being too ashamed to call anybody for help, and growing more frustrated and angry by the second. I need Jesus (and others, for that matter). I can do nothing apart from Christ...not even navigate my way around town. Confidence in myself is not true, lasting confidence at all. Depending on the Lord to be my strength and my guide is the way that is best, and it's the way I really want to live. Getting lost is too frustrating, too time-consuming, and really unnecessary. I will inevitably get lost again (and many more times as long as I'm behind the wheel of a car). But when it comes to life, I want Christ to direct my paths, and to trust in his promise to do so.
Lord, I'm thankful for times when I get lost because I see anew that you are the only Way.
Tonight was one such night when my DI (Direction Impairment) kicked in full force. I was going to a place only a block over from a house that I go to weekly. It should've taken me no more than fifteen minutes to get there. How long did it actually take me? Oh, only thirty-five. I drove around and around, reading the same dang street signs time and again, turning the opposite direction only to wind up in virtually the same place! Not only was I driving for what seemed like hours, but my gas gauge also was sinking dangerously closer to the "E." After about a half hour, I realized there were two things I had done wrong: 1. I had not called anyone at my intended destination to get help for fear of looking incompetent and silly. 2. I had literally thought about asking God for some help, but reconsidered and decided I could find it just fine on my own.
It wasn't until after yelling some improper vocabulary and banging the steering wheel (don't worry...these are just symptoms of DI) that I thought it would be a good time to ask for help. Still too embarrassed to call anyone, I prayed. Unfortunately, no light or star from heaven appeared to show me the way. In fact, I still made a couple wrong turns, continuing to pray that God would help me out, and beginning to feel more at peace. And he answered! The street I was looking for was right under my nose. Hallelujah!
This circumstance may seem slightly melodramatic, but I think it needed to be for me to re-learn a valuable lesson: I can't drive life on my own. Boy, I sure do try. But doing life on my own strength is like having the gas gauge sitting on "E," driving around in circles, being too ashamed to call anybody for help, and growing more frustrated and angry by the second. I need Jesus (and others, for that matter). I can do nothing apart from Christ...not even navigate my way around town. Confidence in myself is not true, lasting confidence at all. Depending on the Lord to be my strength and my guide is the way that is best, and it's the way I really want to live. Getting lost is too frustrating, too time-consuming, and really unnecessary. I will inevitably get lost again (and many more times as long as I'm behind the wheel of a car). But when it comes to life, I want Christ to direct my paths, and to trust in his promise to do so.
Lord, I'm thankful for times when I get lost because I see anew that you are the only Way.
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